Good Job, Now Stop!

Our lecture on motivation I found interesting and that is why I am going to explore a certain article a little more in depth. 5 reasons to stop saying good job really gives me a good insight into motivation. We start off by examining none other than the parent child relationship. We see that praising a child for some tasks can be good, however praising a child all the time would can have the negative effect of manipulation. A praise may feel empty and not earned which will leave the child feeling a sense of frustration and confusion. The second reason discussed would be misleading a child's perception about how  they feel about a certain accomplishment. Parents may praise their children for legitimate reasons, but this may be minimizing how the child really feels about the achievement. Inadvertently we may be imprinting our own feelings on the children which may look more for outside feedback rather than relying on themselves. Building on this idea we are also telling a child how to feel. This can create more confusion in the child's mind that they may feel like they want to feel disappointed but then they are praised. This may even cause frustration, and it goes back to the parents abuse of praise for our convenience. Praise may also be to much of a factor in motivating children to perform a certain activity. Children are performing tasks for praise instead of their own sake or even to explore it. So it is harmful because the children miss the entire point of performing a specific activity. This may have consequences later on as a child raised this way may be more reward focused than driven by exploration and knowledge. This leads into the final point made by the article which was the falling of achievement by the child. Continued praise on everything from the parents may give the child a feeling of superiority and thus may leave the child feeling like he is good at everything when in fact he is not. The fact is that continued praising by the parents of children everywhere is something that should be toned down. This is the wrong way to motivate children and should not be continually used. I'm not saying never praise your children just be aware that to much praise can possibly have a harmful effect on them, and all parents never want to harm their children, so keep a mindful eye.